It's Time for a Coffee Break
I want to write from my heart because that's where unforgettable, wildly emotional stories begin. I have an opinion and can be bossy, but this new adventure will take every ounce of courage I have.
Su... an introduction
Sometimes you have to stop being scared and just go for it. Either it will work out or it won't. That's life.
So, here I am. In 2017, I trekked over the mountain to see the moms. Both lived in assisted living. My mother-in-law had Alzheimer's. Mom fought dementia and fading memory which sounds like the same thing but isn't. Usually, someone in the family went with me but that time it was just me and a rare opportunity to spend a quiet moment with the two women who had such a profound impact on who I've become. When I turn 82. I hope I'm still going strong but as these ladies were the first to point out, life hands out no guarantees.
They both told me the same thing. They didn't want to be where they were. Not physically. Not mentally. Their young lives were so full of life and promise, and in Mom's case, the search for the perfect husband and family occupied the whole of it. I know this because she told me as she reminisced over the past, took responsibility for the mistakes she made, and wished she'd made other choices. It was the first time she'd been so open. She was the one who invented the saying, I'm fine. I don't remember her brooding very often over how much she stumbled, at least not till later in her life. Her mantra was always, I'm fine. That day, when it was just the two of us, she looked back and wished she'd spent her days with more purpose.
If we knew that someday we'd look back on our lives and want to make changes, would we live with more purpose? I hope so.
That day, my mother-in-law didn't know where she would go, only that where she was wasn't home. For that brief two hours, I slowed down enough to just be with her. Was her question, "Mamma, can I go with you?" half-joke or a confused mind reaching out for the safety of a happy memory? I wondered as I watched her enjoy every bite of the slice of Marionberry pie I'd brought. We worked on a puzzle of a white sea otter with eyes the same deep blue as Mom's. I think she enjoyed herself.
They are both gone now and I miss them, but I hope they would be proud that I’m still learning about myself. I am a retired RN. I love to write, garden, and take pictures. I also love books, movies, and dragons, but most of all, coffee… And I love the journey I'm on.
I am a retired Nurse. Mostly in my everyday life, I write, garden, and take pictures. Occasionally, I cook. I love books, movies, and dragons, but most of all, I love coffee. I have written 17 novels and 4 short stories. This year I’m shifting gears and starting on a new adventure, and in the process, will hopefully finish 2 more books.
Come along and go on this journey with me.
~Su